Post Surgery Mindset

Perhaps the most crucial part of an athlete's injury rehabilitation process is the first few weeks following the injury or surgery.  How the athlete acts and what their mindset is like during this critical period is so important because it sets the tone for the entire rehab process.    I am now nearing 3 weeks post surgery to repair the laberal tear in my hip.  These past few weeks have been tough, trying to adopt a new normal and adapt to a new way of doing things.  Being confined to crutches for 6 weeks as well as not being able to bend my hip past 90 degrees during this entire time period has been rough.  The first few days after surgery I was in so much pain that I couldn't fathom the idea of being able to life my leg up or do much of anything.  However, as the days progressed, my pain decreased, and my mobility increased, I felt a little bit more in control of the situation.

I was sent to a physical therapist the day after surgery and immediately began the rehab process.  I was definitely scared and nervous to start doing physical therapy when it had barely been 24 hours since I had the surgery.  With every exercise and movement I was hesitant, but I trusted my physical therapist and was assured that although it was going to be tough I was going to start getting better.  Two days later I went back to physical therapy with the new mindset that I was going to make greater strides in my recovery each day that I went to physical therapy.  I was also given a home program of exercises to be doing on my own.  I was so excited to get this because I knew that my ability to get healthier quicker was in my own hands.  It was my responsibility to do what I could to help with the healing and rehab process.  

I truly believe that the way that an athlete acts in the initial stage of rehab is indicative of how well and how quickly they recover from their injury.  It is so easy to just throw in the towel and think that I just had surgery so I'm not going to be able to do anything for a long time anyways.  The truth is you can always do something to get better.  The smallest things can make the biggest difference even though it may not always be apparent at first glimpse.  

The initial part of my post surgery rehab process may seem really boring and not seem like much fun at all.  However, I look forward to going to physical therapy and the time in my day when I get to do my home exercises.  The way I look at it is, I could be sitting around doing nothing and feeling sorry for myself because I can't play soccer with my teammates or I could do something about it to change the circumstances that I am facing.  If I want to get back out on the field I need to look at physical therapy as my practice session.  Every exercise I do no matter how minor is going to have a major impact on my recovery.  Knowing that I am working to make myself healthier and stronger than before motivates me to get after it every time I go into therapy and makes me eager to push myself in order to see progress.  So just remember to set the tone from the start.  Attack the rehab process and seek to see improvements each and every day.  Take control of your health and be the reason you are successful.

Thoughts Before Surgery

            The night before surgery is one of the toughest times to deal with in the whole injury rehab process.  There are so many thoughts that run through an athlete’s head.  Personally, I can’t help but think of all the possible scenarios that could play out both good and bad, but mostly bad.  This is the time where it is hardest to stay positive.  Anxiety is running high as the hours tick away and the fact that I am going to be getting surgery is really starting to hit me and become a reality.  The fear of surgery is one of the biggest reasons why athletes struggle with their injuries.  It is hard to see the positive outcomes that could come from surgery when we know that we are going to have to go through a great deal of pain and a grueling road of recovery in order to see the ultimate end goal surface. 

            Surgery is bittersweet.  Athletes know that surgery is usually one of their only options in order to recover from their injury and get back to being healthy.  At the same time, it is a really tough process to get through in order to get back to playing their sport.  All the build up to my surgery has been exhausting.  Knowing that I was going to have surgery 3 weeks before my actually surgery date was a plus and a negative.  On the bright side I was able to mentally prepare myself and accept the fact that I was going to be having surgery and that surgery would be my ticket back to soccer.  However, it was tough over those 3 weeks to sit on the sideline watching my team practice and play knowing that everyday I waited until my surgery date was another day that I lost playing with my team.  Each day that passed was another day that my recovery was deferred.  To some extent this waiting just made me wish I could’ve had it right away and gotten it over with.  I also would have been able to avoid the sleepless nights that accompanied the build up to surgery.  
            Watching my teammates play today, once again, reminded me why I am going through the surgery and why I so desperately want to get better.  I want to do it for them.  Even when I have those days where I doubt whether surgery will really help me heal or if I will ever be able to play soccer again, I tell myself to go for it.  I couldn’t live with the fact that I refused to try every possible option and gave up the fight.  I will not let my body determine when I walk away from the game I love.  I know I can get through this surgery and this rehab process because my teammates are my motivation.  Seeing them suit up for practice each day will inspire me to push a little harder in rehab in order to get back to playing by their side.  Seeing my teammates struggle with the frustrations that come with a Division I sport makes me eager to get back out on the field with them and help them get through it.  As I get ready for bed tonight with all the nervous thoughts turning around in my head, I can rest assured that I am making the right decision because I couldn’t imagine my life without soccer and without my team.

The Voice Behind the Blog

Now that you have had a chance to see what my mission is for this blog, I feel that it would help to tell you a little bit about my story.  Growing up I was extremely active.  I was on competitive traveling teams for soccer and basketball as well as dance.  When I wasn’t at one of those activities I spent my time running, working out, or finding some sport or activity to participate in just for fun.  I was so fortunate to never have any notable injuries during this time.  I can’t remember hardly ever having to sit out of a practice or game.  I could probably count on one hand the number of times that happened in 15 years of competitive sports.  However, as my final season of high school soccer was coming to a close my athletic career would take a turn for the worse and be greatly altered. 

I was diagnosed with a stress fracture in my right shin.  At the time I didn’t realize the magnitude that this injury would have on defining how my soccer career would continue from that point on.  I was forced to sit out most of my senior season of soccer due to the stress fracture and was only able to play in the “big games.”  Even in those games that I did play it was through incredible pain and not under the circumstances that I would have wanted my senior season to be.  One of the hardest parts was watching my fellow seniors, which I had played with from the beginning, suit up for our senior night game while I sat on the sideline cheering them on.  I wanted so desperately to share that special moment with my friends because I knew that our time playing together was going to be coming to an end soon. 

When the season finally came to a close the realization that all the fun times that I had in high school and club sports was over.  It was time for me to pack my bags and take my soccer career on a new journey to play at the University of Northern Iowa.  The thought of leaving a soccer environment that was so comfortable and basically my home for a majority of my life, to go play at the Division I level was frightening.  I was even more nervous because I wasn’t healthy and I wouldn’t be able to attack the summer training the way I wanted to.  As if the transition to college athletics wasn’t already complicated and scary, throwing in a nagging stress fracture was not part of my plan. 

I quickly realized that I had to accept the fact that I only had one option and that was to try and do what I could to heal my shin and find alternative ways to get my conditioning done.  The whole summer I religiously went to physical therapy and then went on my own to get my cardio in by biking, swimming, and water running.  I was going to do everything in my power to get healthy so that I could go into my first collegiate soccer season at the top of my game.  It was not an easy road.  I was always thinking about what my teammates were doing compared to what I was doing and I felt that nothing I did was quite enough.  I was bombarded with the thoughts that I was going to be way behind everyone and what my teammates and coaches would think of me.  What it all came down to was that I just had to keep grinding away and taking all the necessary steps to get me back to soccer.  I needed to worry about myself and not focus on what others were doing. 

By the end of the summer my shin was feeling great I hadn’t had pain for several weeks, so I was all ready to start conditioning and practicing with my team during preseason.  About a day or two into two-a-days my worst fear would happen.  The piercing pain in my shin would come back to pay a visit and this time wouldn’t leave.  The thought of all my hard work over the summer being wasted was devastating.  At the first sign of the shin pain coming back my athletic trainer and I started an alternative training program as well as physical therapy to try and get through the brutal two-a-days.  Although it was a bumpy road I made it out of preseason and into the regular season.  As the frequency and intensity of training would start to level out during competition season the severity of my shin pain would dull down a bit.  By the end of the season it was finally feeling decent. 

With my first season of college soccer under my belt and my shin seeming to be under control I was excited to start our off season conditioning.  I was finally able to go out and run and do all the conditioning with the team.  Yet again only a couple weeks into my training the stabbing pain in my shin would come back once again.  Then things would continue to go downhill from there.  One wintery day in January, I was walking to 8am class when all of a sudden my foot started to slip, I felt a crack and before I knew it I was sitting on the ground knowing that I was not going to be getting good news.  My athletic trainer came and picked me up to take me to the doctor.  She tried to reassure that it was just an ankle sprain, but I knew deep down that it was broken. 

I got the results back from the x-ray and found out that I suffered a spiral fracture to my fibula (on the same leg that I had the stress fracture).  To make matters even worse the doctor said that I was going to need surgery to repair it.  I could not believe what I was hearing.  Here I am on my first day of the spring soccer season and I find out that I am going to be out for the entire season.  I could never have imagined myself in that position because I had never really been injured let alone experienced surgery.  When the surgery was completed I had a plate and five screws in my ankle and a long rehab process ahead of me.  The one good thing that we thought could come out of this was that the stress fracture in my shin would get the time off that it needed because I was confined to crutches and a boot for months. 

I made it through the rehab process and was released to ease back into the running and conditioning program by the time summer rolled around.  After a crazy freshmen year of injuries I was excited to work hard over the summer so that I could come back for my sophomore year and show everyone how I could play at my best.  The nasty thing about nagging injuries is that they don’t go away.  I bet you can guess what happened next.  My shin pain came back in full force.  I was really confused and bummed out when this happened because I thought for sure after all the hard work that I put in during the spring rehabbing from surgery and giving my shin several months of rest I was finally going to be good to go.  Once again I was forced to spend my summer going to physical therapy and doing all low impact training.  I was starting to think that I would never be completely healthy and able to play at the level I wanted to. 

I went into my sophomore year dragging my shin pain with me.  I kept playing throughout the season as the pain continued to get stronger and more frequent.  It got to the point where I was wearing a boot during the day and took it off to play and practice.  Eventually, it got to the point where my entire shin and the ankle that I had surgery on were causing me constant severe pain.  The last couple weeks of the season I finally had to call it quits because I could no longer run or cut and change direction.  I had lost a great deal of the range of motion of my ankle and I couldn’t walk around the house with out getting stabbing pain up my shin. 

Once again I visited the doctor where I found out that I needed to have another surgery to remove the plate and screws in my ankle because they were now causing more problems than they were solving.  I attacked the rehab process once again eager to play my spring season and finally prove my playing potential.  I was fortunately able to make it through the spring season with minor pain in my shin.  By this point I was used to the pain and the idea of playing through it was something I accepted. 

During this past summer my physical therapist shared with us information about a treatment that he thought could help heal my shin.  We hadn’t found anything that worked in solving this issue yet, so we thought we would go check it out.  I ended up receiving the injection treatment in my leg and was hopeful and excited that I may have finally found a solution to a 2-½ yearlong chronic shin pain.   This year was finally going to be my year to shine.  I was going to be able to play at the level that I knew I could play at and get to play the way that I knew I could play without anything holding me back.  Then the unimaginable happened. 

I found out that during the first week of preseason I tore the labrum in my left hip.  I am still in shock at the new reality that I am facing.   For the first time in my college career I am missing a competition season.  This news came as a huge blow to me, especially because a labral tear in the hip is just something that doesn’t happen very often.  It turns out I need surgery to repair it and I will be having the surgery in a few weeks.  I know that I am about to experience the toughest and longest rehab process I have been through yet, but I feel that I can come out of all of this as a stronger player and person. 

Sometimes I just wonder why me?  How could I go all of my life until the age of 18 practically injury free to having a surgery every year that I have been in college.  It makes me wonder if I should continue playing soccer or if my body is trying to tell me otherwise.  Whatever message my body is trying to send me, it is hard to comprehend when my heart tells me don’t ever give up on the sport you love, keep playing

A Smart Start

As an athlete one of the worst things to hear is: season ending injury.  These three simple words can change everything in an instant and have an even greater affect on the psychological state of the athlete.  Knowing that the season is over even before it has really started makes for an extremely long and difficult road ahead.  We never think that something like that will happen to us and hopefully it never does, but when an athlete is presented with an injury that puts an end to things they quickly realize how much everything has changed.

            The initial emotions felt and the effects of an injury are often hard to recall, but can be some of the most crucial factors that impact the entire rehab process.  It is so easy to feel depressed and hopeless when you are faced with an injury.  Many athletes just feel bad for themselves because they know that they are going to be out of their sport for a while.  However, this is no time to be negative and sit back and be sad about the condition you are in.  This is the time to pick your chin up and get your head on straight with the mindset that you are going to attack the rehab process and come back better than ever before.  The mentality you have from the very start is going to set the tone for the entire process.  Feeling bad for yourself is not an option.  Staying positive is the key to a successful comeback.  Personally, I look at each day as an opportunity to better myself, so each time I walk (or crutch) into the training room for rehab I am ready to push myself.  You are not going to get better by doing nothing.  With the right attitude and motivation milestones can be reached and goals can be met.